Facebook and New YEars

Ah, the wonders of facebook. A few weeks back I was at the Asian Ward Christmas party, the "razzle dazzle". I introduced myself to this guy by saying, "Hey, I'm steven", to which the guy replied, "yes, I know, I've stalked your facebook". To which I was like "0_0 ..... kewl...."

And that's not the first time it's happened. So to facebook, thank you. Thank you for allowing people to know me before they meet me. It allows everyone to become mini-celebrities. lol.

On obedience

- sometimes people ask me how i cope at byu with all the rules. sometimes, people ask me that in general with mormonism. They say we have too many rules. I just say "it's liberating. makes life more fun." they are usually perplexed by this to which I reply "have you ever played a basketball game without rules?" Usually, they get the point then. You get the most done, and you get the most fun when you're obedient as much as you can. It never crossed my mind that it holds true after the mission as well. So here's to some new New Years' resolutions.

What is Beautiful is Good

There's this phenomenon in social psychology called something like "What is beautiful is good". Basically, humans have a tendency to believe that a beautiful person automatically equates to goodness, niceness, and sweetness without actually knowing the person. Something like "oh, she's not the kind of girl to do something like that!" when we don't even know the person that well.

I admit that I fall for that real easily. Add to that the fact that I'm naive when it comes to figuring out people's dispositions, the fact that I always see the good in people and give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and the fact that the gift of discernment has always been my weak point and you just get the worst sucker this side of the hemisphere.

However, from my own personal experience, it's ironic that often times the prettiest girls have also been the nicest to me, and the less attractive are actually the ones that are complete jerks and who act very rude. I don't know what it is. Maybe cause I try to date them? I don't know.

The Usual Suspects

It's been a difficult semester. My social life has taken a hit due to my laziness and anti-social-ness. I haven't been on a date in over two months, but I just feel reluctant to get back in the groove. But in the end, the truth is that I really have no options right now and I haven't done anything to increase it. Before it just felt like these things came to me, but I have to work for them now and I got lazy. XD

The classes I thought were easy have suddenly piled on at the end and I've been studying nearly non stop for the last two days (not including today) and yet, I still feel vastly unprepared. Usually I don't doubt my own abilities especially when I've studied so hard, but I just don't feel it this time. Too much energy is just gone. It's been good that I've had some support over the last few days, Miranda and Jaymie (who are awesome) on Monday. I studied for about 8 hours total with them. Then yesterday Ha and Brian held me out. Ha was really helpful in teaching me stuff I needed for work, and Brian was awesome in just keeping me company. We even tried studying at Denny's. Aside from the loud teenage kids that happened to be there too (school night too, what were they doing there?), it was actually fun. Brian tried to pick up a girl at the library...whom we later saw at Denny's with a guy. AHA. awkward?

Then today, LightsArmy pulled through. They are all so supportive and nice, even as the drama unfolds somewhat over in Toronto. Most of them are going through finals too so they've been understanding....if not entirely distracting.

Then I got to thinking about next semester and how it will kill me. I'll be even busier than before and I don't know if I'll have the energy to pull through it. I will though that's for sure. It just feels like I'm climbing a cliff now (Finals) to face a bigger mountain soon (next semester). It feels almost insurmountable and overwhelming. I'm already making a mental checklist of things that I will have to do in order to make it. For example, I HAVE to make an effort to be more social. I think it has some sort of impact on my grades.

Even as I think about this, a familiar tune starts playing on my iTunes, almost like an old friend who has been there for me. "Drive my Soul". I guess that's another reason why I love LIGHTS so much. Her songs tell me things I need to hear without me having to explain myself to anyone or without me needing to ask.

Let's do it to it!

Cactus in the Valley

Last night I went to the Asian Ward Christmas "Razzle Dazzle". And I went alone. It was the first time in a long time that I had gone alone to a social event. I only go alone to stuff when I know people at the social event haven't known each other yet. But I decided to go. And it was actually really fun. I met a missionary who served in Provo during my time whom I had never met yet. That brought back some mission memories. When I woke up this morning I had the strong yearning to want to serve another mission because of the inherent challenge. Serving another mission would be hard, but that was what made it so appealing. The challenge. The push, the progress to become better. I haven't felt a challenge like that in a long time. But I suppose there is a time and season for everything and right now my challenge, time, and season is post-mish life.

However, I do realize that next semester may be the most challenging in a long time. Not only will I have the heavy classes of C S 142 and chinese 201 (whose workload is twice as much as chinese 102) on top of senior level sociology classes, but I will be taking morning shifts at work. In addition I will most likely be job shadowing pharmacists. I also want an internship (though the likelihood of that winter semester is a lot less likely). This leaves my social life contained to home teaching and church. haha. But I'm actually kinda looking forward to it. :D

btw, the kitteh is random. LOL

People I Meet Randomly

I have, I would say, a knack for meeting random people. For example, take Asia. How did I meet her? Randomly at the wilk terrace. She was reading a book when I first noticed her. I went to talk to some missionaries and when I came back she was talking to a friend of mine (who in turn I had just met a few days prior). I assume that he was trying to pick her up, but what happened instead was that Asia and I clicked, we ended up chatting, exchanged phone numbers, and the rest is history. Asia is also the person who single-handedly got me to get texting, then single handedly forced me to get unlimited texting. lol. The funny thing is, I never talked to that dude again, but Asia and I remain friends to this day. To that I say, thank you random breakdancing dude. (though no thanks when I was talking to Asia about books he said, "I bet a lot of guys try to pick you up by asking you what you're reading huh?").

Case Number 2. A friend and I went to a Japanese club thingy together. I met Addie on the way to the Japanese event. Somehow, one way or other, Addie and I became pretty good friends while the original friend I went with never really talk anymore. Go figure.

Now this leads me to what happened today. A while ago, a girl added me on facebook. I had no idea who she was. She had no pictures, but we had a lot of mutual friends. I couldn't recall who she was, and since we had a lot of mutual friends I thought I must have met her one way or other. We started chatting a lot on facebook, and just today, she asked me for a ride to wal-mart. So i was wondering if she knew who I was. Apparently, she knew that I didn't know who she was. Anyway, I finally met this girl today. Mystery lady solved.

Sad to say, I don't think we clicked....and I mean, given the circumstances in which we met its understandable.

I look forward to making random friends.

BTW, the picture doesn't have anything to do with anything. I just thought it was kewl. :D